Promises to Keep
by drizzletomyhurricane
Summary: A one shot of s4 with a twist. Tristan and Miles are together... but Lola is keeping the baby. Can they make it work or will feelings get in the way? Basically the same universe as my longer fic, except Triles is still together. Mostly Mola-centered.


Miles hadn't meant to spend the afternoon with Lola. Honestly, he hadn't. He had planned on doing some homework, FaceTiming Tris, maybe watching an episode or two of _Black Mirror_ , and calling Lola before bed to check up on the baby like he always did.

But then he walked inside and saw Lola on his living room couch.

Lola had been at the Hollingsworth house for Frankie. They were working on a history project together— something about medicine in the Middle Ages. But Frankie had gotten distracted by a phone call from Esme, and Lola wasn't feeling too well, so she decided to lie down on the couch for awhile.

Lola opened her eyes immediately at the sound of the front door, almost like she could sense Miles' presence instantly. "Oh, Miles," she yawned, sitting up a tiny bit. "Hey."

"Hey," Miles said, taking a seat next to her. He sat at the very end of the couch, so she would have plenty of room still, and handed her an extra pillow. Whatever he could do to make her feel more comfortable.

Lola was just over six months along now. For the first couple of months, the word "pregnant" had felt like a completely unfamiliar word, something that sounded so unnatural rolling off teenagers' tongues. But now it was impossible to look at Lola and think of anything _but_ the word "pregnant." Her baby bump wasn't just a bump anymore, but a fully formed round belly. She got stares all the time now, especially at school.

Whenever Miles overhead a nasty remark about her in the halls, it made him want to punch his fist into his locker. He knew it wasn't fair that Lola was the one getting all of the dirty looks when he was just as responsible for that baby. Lola hadn't done anything wrong, she was just a girl who happened to get unlucky her first time. She'd even been on the pill, even if she had messed up taking them. Lola hadn't done this on purpose to ruin Tristan and Miles' relationship or something. She'd never been anything but wonderful to Miles, she had been there for him in one of his hardest times and kept his mind from wandering to a dark place. She'd been his _hope_. Miles couldn't help but feel terribly guilty for everything she was dealing with now. Even if he was still trying to make things work with Tristan, he wouldn't abandon their baby— or Lola. He could never do that to her. Even if they weren't together, even if he belonged to someone else... she still meant something to him.

"So, how are you feeling?" Miles asked, patting Lola's hand gently. It hadn't been easy, but they'd managed to still maintain a pretty good relationship through all of this. A friendship, or... or something. They tried not to talk too much in front of Tristan, but Miles still called her every night to check on her and they still found themselves falling asleep on the phone with each other occasionally.

Lola eyes looked even more exhausted than usual. "I'm okay," she sighed. "Just... really tired and hormonal. The baby's _so_ restless today."

"It is?"

"Yeah," Lola said. She grabbed his hand and moved it over to her stomach. Miles' eyes widened at the feeling of the baby moving. He'd probably felt it kick a hundred times by now, but it still surprised him every time.

Lola nodded. "Feel that? It's all jumpy and hyper." She draped her arm over her forehead, adding, "Probably from _your_ genes."

"Sorry... my fault," Miles said, his instinctive response to everything these days. He knew better than to argue with a hormonal Lola.

Lola scooted a little closer to him. "I'm glad you're here, though," she said. She sighed, leaning into him a bit. "Honestly. I really couldn't do this without you," she added, offering him a tiny smile.

Miles smiled back. "Of course, Lo," he said. He pulled her towards his lap, tousling her hair gently. He wasn't thinking of Tristan or how this might look to anyone else right now. He was only thinking of her. "This is our baby, after all."

They just laid like that for a bit, just the two— well, three— of them together. Miles rubbed Lola's back and her feet, listening to her talk about everything from stretch marks to baby names to that weird unicorn Frappuccino she kept craving lately.

"You know," Lola mused, still lying in his lap. "Maybe the baby would calm down a little if you had a word with it."

Miles blinked. "Huh?"

"You know," Lola said. "Try talking to it. People do it all the time. Trust me, I saw it on _Friends_."

"I... okay. Fine. Why not," Miles caved. Whatever would make Lola happy. He put his head against her stomach. "Um, hey, baby," he said to her bump. He had no idea what he was doing, honestly. "Can you... can you let your mom rest for a second? You've been kicking all day."

"Or no dessert tonight," Lola added, looking down at her bump and giggling. "I'll skip that chocolate cake after dinner if I have to."

Miles couldn't help but shake his head laughing. "Yeah. Give your mom a break or you won't get dessert tonight," he added, pretending to be all stern. He locked eyes with Lola and grinned, laughing in a way he hadn't in quite awhile. Lola had a way of doing this, bringing out a goofy side of himself that he didn't even know existed. And just for a moment, it felt like maybe everything was going to be okay.

That moment didn't last long.

The front door creaked open again just then, so quiet Miles and Lola almost didn't hear it at first. They were so caught up in each other that they didn't notice Tristan coming through the front door, a horrified and angry look on his face as he saw Lola lying in Miles' lap, his head still near her stomach. "Oh, _hell_ no," Tris said.

Miles looked up, suddenly pulled out of that peaceful state. "Tris," he said. "This... this isn't what it looks like."

"I was just here for Frankie," Lola added quickly. She and Tristan had barely spoken at all— she always tried to keep her distance from him, not wanting to mess up his and Miles' relationship even more. She could tell from the comments and side-eyes of people like Jonah and Grace that everyone thought she'd already done more than enough. She almost felt selfish sometimes for keeping this baby, for not just disappearing from Miles' life after Tristan woke up like her character in the play did.

Tristan laughed a little under his breath. "Right," he muttered. "That must be why you're lying in my boyfriend's lap."

Miles sat up, quickly scooting away from Lola. "Look, Lola didn't do anything wrong, okay?" he said. "She just wasn't feeling well is all. If you're pissed, fine, fair enough. But be pissed at me, not her."

The last few months had been awkward between the three of them, to say the least. When Miles finally told Tristan the truth about Lola a few months ago, he'd expected to get dumped for sure. And it _had_ hurt Tristan. Badly. He didn't talk to Miles for three days after he told him about the baby, not knowing what on earth to say. He didn't want to think about Lola lying in Miles' bed, feeling his kiss, his body inside her. He didn't want to think about Lola carrying a piece of Miles, something that would tether them together for life. And honestly? It kind of sucked knowing there would be a baby out there who was half-Miles and half-Lola when, biologically speaking, there could never be one that was truly half-Miles, half-Tris. When Miles showed him the ultrasound photo last month, he nearly felt sick. But Tristan still stayed with him because... well, he didn't know why exactly. Tris loved him, sure. But more than that, he was terrified of being alone, of losing his boyfriend, and worst of all, losing his boyfriend to a girl the way he'd always feared he could. Zoe had called Tris out on this as being biphobic, but he'd just brushed her off. Lola Pacini was a threat to his relationship and he knew it.

The longer Tristan stared at Lola, his eyes stuck on her growing belly, the angrier he became. Angry at Miles for cheating. Angry at Lola for keeping this baby. Angry at Miles for insisting on being there for Lola. Angry that as soon as he'd finally woken up, as soon as he'd gotten his life back, he'd been launched into his worst nightmare. "No, you know what?" Tristan said. "I'm pissed at the both of you. And I _can_ be."

Lola sat up, wincing a little as the baby kicked her ribs. She knew stress wasn't good for her, but what could she do? "Look, Tristan, this... this wasn't planned. I didn't mean to hurt you or steal Miles or something. It wasn't like that."

Tristan raised his eyebrows, not buying that whole good intentions spiel. She slept with his boyfriend (albeit complicated circumstances), got herself pregnant, and he was supposed to... what? Feel sorry for her? "What _was_ it like then?" he scoffed, feeling himself growing more and more upset. "Because it sounds like you just crawled into his bedroom like a skan—"

" _Tris_!" Miles snapped, knowing where this was headed. "Just stop it, okay?" He squeezed Lola's hand immediately without even realizing, like an instinct to protect her or something.

Lola didn't know what to say anymore. She glared at Tristan a little for his remark, but was too tired to really say anything back. She was just completely exhausted— this baby was sucking up all of her energy and it wasn't even born yet. "Um, I can just... get going..." she muttered awkwardly to Miles, trying to get off the couch but not really able to do so on her own anymore.

"No, don't go. Just— stay and rest," Miles said to her. He turned to Tristan. "Let's go talk about this somewhere else."

He and Tristan walked to the backyard, not saying a word to each other. They went into the pool house, the same spot they'd shared that kiss at during Miles' campaign party over a year ago.

Miles slammed the door shut, barely looking at Tristan. "That was seriously fucked up, you know that?"

"How do you think _I_ feel?" Tristan said. He paused for a second, angry but his eyes genuinely full of hurt. "I do all this work to surprise you with a visit— do you know how _hard_ it was to convince my mom to let me Uber here, to get around without my walker? I come here for you and I find Lola Pacini in your lap?"

Miles shook his head. "I told you, it was nothing."

"Didn't seem like nothing."

Miles finally locked eyes with him. "You're still angry at me, aren't you?" he said. "You said you could forgive me for hooking up with Lola, you said we could get past this... but you're still not over it, are you?"

Tristan didn't say anything. For months he'd been putting up with all of this, trying to ignore Lola and the fact that Miles was really having a kid with her. But there was only so much he could pretend that everything was fine.

And things weren't fine. They hadn't been for a long time. "I guess not," Tristan finally said.

"Look, Tris," Miles sighed. "I'm still going to be a dad. I can't change that. Lola is having this baby and I... I need to be there for her. And for my kid."

Tristan was quiet for a second. He pictured the next few months, Miles going to all of those doctor's appointments with Lola, Miles taking her to Lamaze class, Miles being there for the birth and holding his and Lola's newborn baby in his arms, all while Tristan... what? Watched from the sidelines? "You're just staying with me out of pity," he found himself blurting out.

Miles just stared at him, clearly hurt. "C'mon, Tris... I loved you. I... I _still_ do."

"But do you love her?"

"I told you," Miles said. He looked nervous all of a sudden. "I ended it at soon as you woke up. I... I chose you, remember?"

Tristan could barely look at him. "But do you still love her?"

Miles didn't say anything. He just stood there frozen.

"Tell me you don't," Tristan begged. He felt his eyes get teary and he couldn't help but feel a sense of deja vu. "Tell me you don't love Lola anymore."

Miles just stared down at the floor, still completely silent.

Tristan nodded. He had his answer. He turned to go, but Miles grabbed his wrist. "Tris..."

Tristan turned around, tears in his eyes. "No," he said simply. "No, Miles. I can't." He paused. "You know... you may have "chosen" me. But you really wanted her all along."

As Miles watched Tristan leave the poolhouse, he couldn't help but think that he was right. Maybe he had clung to Tristan because he was safe, familiar. Even with all the passive aggressive remarks, the fights, the biphobic insults... Miles always knew Tristan would stick around. He had loved Tristan. He had. But maybe Tristan wasn't really what he wanted after all. Maybe he had wanted Lola all along— he was just too afraid to admit it.

Miles wandered back into the main house, still a little shaken and trying to process what had just happened. "Lo...?" he called. "You still here?"

He walked into the living room and chuckled at what he saw: Lola fast asleep on the couch, curled up with the pillow like a teddy bear. Careful not to wake her, he quietly slid onto the couch behind her and wrapped his hands around her belly. He closed his eyes along with her, feeling a little sad and a lot overwhelmed, but still somehow better than he'd felt in a long time.

As he felt the baby kick again, he realized something. He didn't know exactly what the future held for him and Lola, but one thing was for sure: he did love her.

He'd never been more certain of anything.


End file.
